I have a negative guard, up over my life. How do I remove it?

I have a negative guard, up over my life. How do I remove it?

How many times have you gotten hurt or failed at something? So, because of that disappointment or failure, you have placed a protective shield over how you do things in your life, thinking it will keep you from making future mistakes. You do not even realize that you are recreating a negative bubble and it is ruining you. 

Failure or hurt is not a curse it is not a reason to give up, or overly protect yourself from it, nor is it a reason to not give something a try again. When things negatively affect your life, it is a preparation for the great things to come. I know this sounds cliche. However, it is true.

Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

Here are ways to immediately change from having a negative shield over yourself to a productive one. 

  • Think about a situation that broke your heart or stressed you out, how did you feel? Would you want to feel that way right now?  Now, with that same situation in mind reminisce on how you felt when you started that circumstance before the disappointment came. For example a new relationship or business venture. Felt good right? Now, think back (again) about the hurt and pain that occurred during that time and remind yourself how many times you thought 'I wish I did things differently, or I wish I were not in this situation.' 
  • Where are you in life now? If you are feeling down over the situation, it is important you first realize what you went through was not a mistake it was a learning curve. You are only sad or disappointed because you are still hung up on the great 'FEELING' you had at the BEGINNING, not the sense of the disappointment that made you walk away or hurt you. You comprised yourself and became comfortable in the negative circumstances. It can be called wishful thinking after the fact. It is a time when you remember the good ole days instead of the bad days. The bad days were pretty big, and this is why you are not in the situation any longer. Once you understand this, it will bring your thoughts into a better perspective this way you can begin to have better days. 
  • Instead of forcing yourself to get over a situation from the past or protect yourself way too much in the today, focus on the things that you wanted to do differently and implement them in your present. 
  • Now that you know what you want to do oppositely from what you did before start making moves you can build on.
  • Doing things differently+ making changes=Results. Positive variations + active changes=Positive Results. 
  • Every time you get stuck or find yourself in a situation that leaves you unhappy return to this equation and concentrate on the things you would have done differently.
  • Doing this will change the way you feel almost immediately as well as allow you to feel grateful that you are out of a negative incident.
  • Feeling appreciative gives you a good feeling, and that is what you need to move forward and remove any negative thoughts or guards in your life. 

A squad member here at BCG Publications.